Getting The Buddha Mind 56
On the first night I had a discussion with Reverend Jih-Ch'ang regarding which ones here had good chances. However, this was soon forgotten. After that I was completely using my perception-response. To put it more clearly, the Three Jewels used my body and mouth to make this dream happen. I can really say that every moment, every second, I was concentrating on serving you and observing your progress. From the third day, I have been like a midwife, or should I say, like an anxious father outside the delivery room. Now I am completely exhausted. To see that the child was safely born, I was very happy to the point of tears. The Three Jewels have borrowed my body for seven days. That's why I feel so tired. In esoteric Buddhism, there are some specific Dharma methods. When the master transmits one of these methods to a disciple, he uses so much energy, he ends up losing some weight. Now I completely understand this. Maybe it will take quite a few weeks before l can completely recover. I didn't transmit my blood to your bodies, but my energy is in you.
I cannot control your thoughts and goals, or whether you are grateful to the Three Jewels for this experience. I only want to make one more comment. Our karmic relations weren't actually created this week. For example, there are some on whom I spent very little energy, who got much out of this retreat. Others, on whom I spent a lot of energy, did not get as much. Why? Because our karmic conditions are all different. These conditions, created in the past, came to fruition in this retreat.
If your karma was not ripe enough for progress at this time, if you continue practicing, eventually it will surely ripen. If you are one of these, I want to put more effort into helping you. There is no one who cannot get enlightened. Those of you who feel that you have gotten little are getting a lot. Those of you who feel you have gotten a lot are getting very little. Regardless of how you feel, it is simply too early to be disappointed or proud. Don't be discouraged, don't be satisfied. We should all continue to work hard. Those who made good progress should work the hardest. Don't worry about where Shih-fu will be. With good causes and conditions we will be together. The retreat is over. What happens next? Think about it. Of course if this was truly a dream, everything I just said was only nonsense. In that case, forget it.