STUDENT:

To be mindful of our behavior, should we set up an objective observer in our minds that monitors our intentions, thoughts, words and actions?

SHIH-FU:

No, that would make you tense and tired. With meditation you will gradually cultivate an inner stillness, so in any situation, you will not get too excited or emotional. If your mind is relatively peaceful, you will naturally be more aware of your thoughts, and you will know what to say and do. You won't lose control.

When controlled by your emotions and impulses, you are in fact out of control, saying and doing things before you think about the consequences. This is how trouble starts. This is how vexations arise, for yourself and for others.

Therefore, try to stay peaceful, and exercise restraint in your words and actions. This comes gradually, from regular sitting, from being mindful during your daily practice, and from using Buddhadharma to guide your behavior.

On the other hand, if you are always watching yourself like a hawk or a critic, you'll drive yourself crazy, or else you'll be miserable. If there is an observer constantly watching, you won't be able to function smoothly. If piano players always watched themselves play, they wouldn't be able to play anything.

STUDENT:

This question is about compassion. Every day I ride the subway and I see a procession of beggars, homeless people, sick people, and they often ask for money. What attitude should we have in such situations?