Ordinary people see existence in terms of permanence or impermanence, purity or impurity, gain or loss. More to the point, we seek permanence and exert great effort to preserve the things we like. We also want things to remain pure, and that good things would forever increase, or at least, not diminish. Intellectually, we know that all living things eventually die, that there is impurity alongside purity; that gain and loss to hand in hand. We know that death is inevitable, but we keep hoping it will not happen. For example, we congratulate a family that has a newborn baby, but when someone dies, we offer not congratulations, but condolences.

Conversely, there are those who adopt a negative attitude. When they see a newborn, they may say, “Oh, how sad! Another soon-to -be dead person is born!” Instead of admiring the beauty of a blossoming flower, they anticipate it withering away; they see death and decay in everything. Instead of basking in the warmth of a sunny day, they say, “Why be happy? It’ll rain soon enough.” Looking at the freshness of the young, they see only future wrinkles. Such people may be in the small minority, but we all sometimes have this attitude. Many people have told me that my efforts to build the Dharma Drum Mountain Monastery in Taiwan will be in vain, and that when I die, it will fall apart, While this may be literally true, it reveals a negative outlook, and a sort of ignorance.

The son of one of my students died, and many years later, she is still suffering. She asked me for help, so I told her all things come and go and that, eventually, she too would die. Her only question was whether she would see her son after she died, and she wanted to know if meditation would enable her to get in touch with her son. On retreats, during personal interviews, this was her only question. This is an example of ignorance. It is difficult for parents to witness the death of their own children. Truly, when they themselves are at the threshold of life, they will not want to go either. The fear of one’ s own end is one of the great anxieties that lie at the core of our being.